Offenses of rude people

Ninth offense -my mom

2009-03-04T19:30:24Z

Now you are going to say how can my mother be rude. You obviously haven't met my mother.

She is a lovely woman and knows how to charm. All my friends who meet her love her. The thing is she loves them, but will turn around and not so subtly put me down.

For example, one of my friends would have a new hair cut. She would say, "oh that is a lovely hair cut did you just get that honey?" Afterwards, my mom would throw in "I don't know why Lucinda can't do anything with her hair, it's always the same."

Another example would be clothes. "Oh that's a cute skirt where did you get it? Because someone should help Lucinda. She seriously dresses like a bumb."

Keep in mind most of my friends go with me to shop and we all shop at the same places. The best was when one of my friends responded that the dress she had on was mine.

Oh mom.

My solution: I don't have one. When I finally come up with a way to make my mom stop those oh so subtle comments, I'll let you know.

Me and my mother!

Eighth offense -blocking an exit

2009-03-04T19:22:49Z

This is going to be quick.

If you are standing in a filled elevator, and you are the person standing in front of the doors, please step out of the elevator to let people off.

You would think this should be a known rule. Apparently it isn't. This is because a short white hair old man, I would say in his 70s, didn't do this and made me miss my floor because he wouldn't get out of my way. Not even when I asked him to.

My solution: make people who don't move take the stairs. I don't care if you are old and might suffer from heart problems, this would teach you to move when people need to get off of the elevator.

Seventh offense -disturbing others

2009-03-04T18:50:57Z

I really was trying to read this boring academic article on the commuter train yesterday. But, no this short, plump and blond woman wouldn't let me.

You might be asking how could she have done this?

Easy, she was talking loudly into her phone right next to me for the whole train ride. Not once did she shut up.

Then I got to thinking what a bitch she was. Now I understand that once in awhile when you get on a train you might have to make a call, but you don't stay on that call forever.

I have no desire to hear the love note you found at your boyfriend's house from his ex-girlfriend. Frankly, you're old and need to work out, if his ex is hotter I wouldn't blame him for cheating on you.

I know some people like hearing the misery of others, however, I could have cared less at this moment and I couldn't believe this woman wanted to have this conversation in front of strangers.

By the end of the train ride I felt so dirty I wanted a shower because obviously she had to complain about getting tested for an std.

Listen lady there are others on the train who need to read, and if you need to talk on the phone don't sit next to them. It's rude and frankly I don't want to know what is going on in your messed up life. And I'm not the only one who feels this way!

My solution: people like her should be subjected to my mom. One hour listening to my mom blab on and on about the dullest things alive, like coupons, would make these people shut up forever!

My Mom!

Sixth offense -talking over people

2009-02-25T19:54:55Z

Why is it when I'm at work there are always people who feel the need to talk over me. It's always happened at every job I've ever had since birth. Seriously it's so not okay to do this.

In the past it has been bosses, which as the employee you can't say anything. Other times it's with people who should be listening to you, like students. I teach drivers ed.

Anyway, I just would like to know what goes on in these people's mind when they feel the need to speak over someone who is currently talking. With kids I understand, they want to show they know something or they want to be a smart-ass.

With my bosses I understood it was a power trip. They wanted to show that they were in control.

When it involves someone who is on the same level as you, not a clue. Seriously are they idiots why do they do it?

My solution: I would love to be able to tell all these people to shut up, and maybe say an obscenity.

I know I would get fired in certain circumstances, but I know I would feel so much better. Wouldn't you?

Fifth offense -not returning calls

2009-02-25T19:21:18Z

I am guilty of this offense.

One of my friends yelled at me recently for not returning her call. She left me a message and I have a bad habit of not checking my voicemail.

She called back after four days of not hearing from me.

The problem is I know why she is

aggravated with me. I hate it if I call someone and they never return my call. I am just slow at calling people back, while others I know never return calls.

Still I am guilty.

My solution: leave a prank message to the person who doesn't return calls, telling them that they won red sox tickets or concert tickets. Then leave a number for them to collect the tickets at.

The key is having the number be the rejection hotline number, 617-861-3962, where they will be told why they're being rejected.

Then mention the next time you talk to your friend a reason why you might reject them as a friend if they don't return your call. Your friend should be able to put two and two together and realize they need to call you back. Or the person could be an idiot.

And with that being said, I assume now one of my friends is going to leave me a weird number for me to call to claim Linkin Park tickets (obviously I'll call to make sure it's not a fake number because if there's a chance it's real, I'll call). The number will probably lead to a you suck hotline. Who knows.

Fourth offense -wandering children

2009-02-24T13:51:01Z

Silence. I hear silence today while riding the commuter rail this week. Last week there was no silence. You want to know why there was no silence last week? Children.

Last week for those who don't have children was February vacation. All day, everyday last week there were multiple children riding the train with their parents to go into Boston. Some were going to the Children's Museum, while children were screaming at the top of their lungs if they were there yet at the Science Museum.

Now what did not bother me was the screaming at high levels. Nor the look of confusion on parents who normally do not ride the commuter rail needing help on what to do. (Those of you who ride the commuter rail or T know that look I'm talking about, the look of staring off into nothingness because they don't know what to do.)

What bother's me when these children take over a train, because they do, is when the parents allow these children to wander around.

They run up and down the isles bumping into oncoming passengers making it difficult for the regulars to actually take a seat. Or they are blocking the isles and so you freak out because you don't want to miss your stop.

The best is when you try to tell a child to please move out of the way politely. I had a very young mother, I would say a brunette in her late 20s, tell me not to talk to her daughter who was obviously playing in the isle.

The conductors try to make the kids sit down, but they don't listen to them because their parents aren't telling them to sit down so why should they.

My solution to this disturbance is to simply strap the kids down right next to the parents. Now the parents who normally don't like to lose sight of their children will have a new restraint to use that's better than the leash, and those parents who don't care where their kids go will have the pleasure of spending more time with those darling children on their train ride.

This problem would then be solved, or we could simply just banned all children under the age of 12, but I think too many parents who normally don't ride the T/commuter rail would be upset because now they can't go on their normal once or twice a year ride. Oh well at least texting is now banned on some trains!

Third offense -people pushing forward

2009-02-18T12:28:36Z

I was taking the T the other day and while I was standing on the T a middle aged woman plowed through me to get a certain spot.

Now this spot wasn't a seat, but a different location where many people were standing around. The T was filled so her plowing through me along with the other people didn't even phase her.

Obviously when she reached her stop she wasn't near the door to be able to make an easy exit, She had to plow through us for a second time. Instead of just asking politely for us to move or just say sorry, she got frustrated when she heard people complain about her.

My solution to people like that is to have a large person sit on them and never move off of the T.

Second offense -side swiping

2009-02-18T12:04:00Z

I was driving home from dinner last night and I almost got into an accident where I could have seriously been injured. It's ridiculous people do not pay attention when they drive. It happens everywhere.

I was in my car in the middle lane of I 93 and someone in his black Honda Civic almost rashes into me because he didn't check his blind spot.

It's because of people like this, inconsiderate, that people like me have to practice defensive driving.

Obviously I honked my horn because if I didn't this driver would have hit me. Instead of the man holding up his hands in apology or showing some signs of being remorseful, he gives me the finger.

My solution to people who cause or almost cause accidents from not paying attention to the road: have a large metal object crush these people's cars.

First offense -the car horn

2009-02-17T20:43:29Z

I absolutely hate when I'm stuck in traffic and the person behind me slams on his/her horn. I was especially frustrated this morning trying to get to work.

I was stuck on Route 114 in Danvers, Mass., in bumper to bumper traffic. I wasn't going anywhere and of course I have this woman behind me blasting her horn multiple times.

Obviously she was a "busy" woman who needed to get somewhere fast because she was talking on her cell phone and using that great horn of hers. It's not my fault there's traffic. I'm not particularly happy to be in a car at 8:00 a.m.

Here's my solution to all those people who feel the need to honk their car horns while in traffic, get out of the car and run if they're in that much of a rush. Then maybe some people would get some exercise.

It's times like these I would like someone to blowout the tires of these people, so then they would have a real reason to honk their horns.